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Monday, October 13, 2014

10 Lists I Read on the Internet That Made Me Feel Stupid

Maybe I'm just still pondering College Magazine's list of "22 Reasons Why Going to Law School is the Best Decision You'll Ever Make", which, unlike anything I've written, got picked up by Huff Post.  All in good fun, sure, though perhaps over-selling the case and understating the seriousness of law school as a financial proposition.  

But I must not be the only person to notice that the internet seems to have been taken over by lists.  There they are at the bottom and sides of the screen on my tablet, just begging to be clicked on as I strain to get up that one last hill on the stationary bike.  Yes, I know, it's all about ads, and getting to put a different ad up after each click on the list.  Still...

It's as if the internets think people can only think in lists.  I'm all for, say, numbered blog posts, to help make it easier for commenters to point out which aspect of my argument they found the most stupid.  But among the problems with these lists is that their authors seem to gravitate towards the number 10, or 12 (unlike our industry's latest booster), but sometimes getting past eight requires adding a few entries that probably didn't belong.

I'll join the fun, though. Here's a list of recent lists I find silly:

 1. 10 Things You Didn't Know You Could Do With Coffee

 I desire only to smell it, drink it, and dream of it.

2. 10 Explanations for Everyday Things Your Body Does

I prefer to think of myself as a being of only thought and light.

3.10 Things You Didn't Know about the Lion King

Don't care what coast animates what character. Still cry every time Mufasa dies.

4. 10 Reasons Why Sunday Will be an Historic Day in Bills History

Seriously, Buffalo has an NFL team?  Huh.

5. 7 Reasons Why Madison, Wisconsin is the Best Place to Live in America

It's so obviously the best place to live in America we didn't even try for 10 reasons.

6. 10 Quotes that Will Transform Your Life (With Explanations)

Holy Mother Goddess, pagans can go on and on and on...

7. 10 Thoughts While Running Long Distances

Odd that "hurts" and "pain" aren't more prominent, or at least "Riggs, I'm getting too old for this ..."

8. 10 Things You Need to Stop Tweeting About

No Tweets about conferences? That's like the most exciting thing we do, dude.

9. Top 10 Songs to Listen to When You're Angry

Back in my day, we used to call this a "mix tape".

10. 10 Things You Didn't Know about Wrestlemania

Guessing Joe Slater knew most of them.

Posted by Geoffrey Rapp on October 13, 2014 at 09:13 AM in Blogging, Information and Technology, Religion, Sports, Web/Tech, Weblogs | Permalink

Comments

The always insightful Vi Hart on "Five Reasons We Like Five Reasons Videos":

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_cyw3ncjnH8

Posted by: Jennifer Hendricks | Oct 13, 2014 10:28:55 AM

And I just missed "7 Management Lessons from the Walking Dead." http://www.marketwatch.com/story/7-management-lessons-from-the-walking-dead-2014-10-13

Posted by: Geoff | Oct 13, 2014 10:38:46 AM

You forgot "Number 6 will blow your mind!"

Posted by: Christine Hurt | Oct 13, 2014 4:12:25 PM

I only knew 5 of those 10 things, so just short of "most of them." As always, I am sorry to disappoint you.

Posted by: Joseph Slater | Oct 14, 2014 10:42:16 PM

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